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Tapestry, aka Tim

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Horoscopes [Jan. 14th, 2007|09:41 am]
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Your Friendly Horoooscope
For the week of January 14 to January 20, 2007

By Tim Frayser, "America's Most Trusted Astrologer"

Aries (March 21--April 19): Unconscious negative thoughts are just the kind of things that put people on rooftops with sniper rifles. What exactly are your secret fears about toast?

Taurus (April. 20--May 20): Understanding someone else completely can be a really terrible idea. Try to do something about that fishy smell.

Gemini (May 21--June 21): A difficult decision isn't going to get easier, no matter how long you're out on bail. Find a quiet spot in the bowling alley and search your heart.

Cancer (June 22--July 22): Let someone else's trial transcripts serve as a warning for you. Being multifaceted isn't the same as being disfunctional.

Leo (July 23--Aug. 22): Sometimes other people mistake you for someone who knows what they're doing. Maintain a low profile while going through customs.

Virgo (Aug. 23--Sept. 22): Before you begin any kind of endeavor, it's important to wash with soap and water. People find you intensely fascinating, at least as far as you know.

Libra (Sept. 23--Oct. 23): Work is definitely an important part of your life, especially if someone else is doing it. Looking for change in your couch will provide you with direction.

Scorpio (Oct. 24--Nov. 21): Take pride in your ability to handle the TV remote control. A change in attitude will eventually effect your occurances of road rage.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22--Dec. 21): The moon's in your sign, so perhaps you are a little more flatulant than usual. With a little help, you can access inward resources that just might get you out of bed in the morning.

Capricorn (Dec. 22--Jan. 19): Sometimes, you think you may know somebody very well; other times, they're on their way to a furry convention. Live and let live.

Aquarius (Jan. 20--Feb. 18): A special someone really needs to defrost their refrigerator. What you consider a romantic overture might be considered stalking in some states.

Pisces (Feb. 19--March 20): You will be given a chance to reap the benefits of your hard work through a lucrative opportunity involving selling soap. Treat people as you wish they'd treat you in line at the DMV.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: [info]shackrlu
2007-01-14 06:46 pm (UTC)

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YaY! The long awaited return of the Horooscopes!
[User Picture]From: [info]squirrelsunite
2007-01-22 02:30 am (UTC)

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Your horoscope actually kinda came true for me!
[User Picture]From: [info]tapestry01
2007-01-22 05:05 am (UTC)

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You'd be surprised how often I hear that!